The Beautiful Intrigue

I see you lingering around,
like a bad idea come to life
forming a romantic side
corrupting the storm
with the beauty of sirens
drowning in the rain
that fills the cracks
of the empty streets.

I see you lingering around,
like a flame on a clear night
the shallow end of the sun
sweeping up the debris
setting it on fire
resurrecting the dust
a wave of sighs sighing
fills my eyes crying.

I see you lingering around,
like a household god
as intriguing as Voodoo
an essence of the tomorrow's past
filling in the yesterday's
with a majesty of yearning
resting love on my palm
before blowing away.

I see you lingering around,
like a stranger full of
a beautiful mystery
I will bottle up your intrigue
occasionally looking inside
when I want to feel the electricity
of the fantasy of you
that lingers on in my dreams.

COPYRIGHT: CARLA HAGLUND

How Did Life Break You?

How did life break you?
I feel it in your bones,
the weight of the world.
In my closed hands,
I feel the emptiness
that used to be filled with
the weight of a soul.
How did life break you?
I want to breath into you,
A new life.
I am only naked and alone
My own pile of bones
with an unbreakable resolve.
How will life break me?

Image and Poem Copyright: Carla Halgund

The Dance

I wanted to dance with a ghost
Twisting and twirling to the moonlight
so I called out a name in the graveyard
an open invitation to any spirit so obliged.
Out of the fog she came
limbs aflame and glowing
an arabesque of her former life
she twirled in the night shadows.
I grabbed her hand and kissed it
the smell of earth and despair
she nodded and bowed
and so began her dance of loss
the dance of all she was and is.
We lost ourselves in the movements
dancing the dance of life and death
merged together as the cycle continues
dancing with the ghosts of ourselves.

Image and poem Copywright: Carla Haglund

The Cycle Of Sadness

There is a budding flower in the desert somewhere. Deep in the desert, right in the middle of miles and miles of sand. The world lacks color in this desolate land, but this flower is as vibrant as the blinding sun. It pops out of the sand like a splash of color in a black and white movie. The green of the stem and leaves with the red of its petals are such a contrast of both sight and emotions to its encircling landscape. As this flower matures, it dreams of the place it will be enjoying life in. Will it be in a garden surrounded by flowers of all colors and kindness? "Who will I be planted next to?", It wonders. Most importantly, the flower dreams of love. Petal to petal the flower will touch others of its kind and feel at ease. A place with blue skies and songs, where the smell of sweetness fills the soul with happiness. As the day arrives that the flower will break out of its cocoon of consciousness, the flower feels an anticipation like no other, but a relief to finally shake this lonely feeling. As it's petals begin to open, and it becomes aware of its surroundings. The flower says in a fragile voice of shock and disappointment, "there must be a mistake, I don't belong here...life doesn't belong here". Lonely, the flower whispers "Love doesn't live here". Not one solitary soul "HELLO!" The flower wails desperately, no one answers there is only an echo of emptiness. Days pass as the flower begins to wilt and feel hope for a better life to come with death, rain comes and breathes new life into this delicate being renewing its body, but not spirit. The cycle of sadness flows through this flower like Cytoplasm flows through its veins. Photosynthesis is not enough and the heat of the desert does not warm the soul of this lonely flower of the desert. The flower has never known what its like to feel a warm breathe talk to it, yet it craves it like its ingrained in the fiber of its being. It yearns for a touch of any kind, an embrace or just something that will listen to its cries, but "My cries go unheard" it says to no one. The flower begins to lose its color and its once dreamy nature has been replaced with a blank stare. Nothing tastes and nothing feels as the numbness creeps up its stem. This flower becomes committed to feeling this defeated loneliness living in the nowhere.

One day a strong wind came that almost took the flower away. The flower lets the wind rip through it, secretly pleading to the air to take it away "rip me out of this nightmare", but the roots are firmly planted and the flower is held captive. The suffocating loneliness lingers as the flower remains planted in the land of the wrong. Little does the flower know that the wind brought it a present, one small seed landed right beside the flower. As the flower cries, the tears drip down to the seedling providing it with the necessary means to grow. Slowly the seedling springs forth growing little by little until one day the bud can be seen coming up from the sand. Yet the flower does not notice because its trapped in a mindless state of solitude never realizing that things could change. Daily the flower sheds tears and daily the seedling grows faster and stronger for the tears are this seedlings sustaining force. Finally one day the seedling is now a budding flower and as tall as the sad flower, yet still, the sad flower does not know of its presence because it is trapped in a deep depression unaware of its surroundings any longer. The day comes when the bud opens its petals, in a strong and happy voice the new flowers says "Hello". The sad flower hears the voice, and for the first time in weeks, it feels hope. The sad flower awakens out of his darkness and starts to see the world how he was meant to see it. Petal to petal the two flowers keep each other company swaying in the breeze, soaking up the sun's rays and filling each others emptiness with love.Without tears, the new flower starts to wilt and not even the seldom rain can help. The new flower has adapted to living off of tears, but tears haven't been shed by the old flower for it is no longer sad. The new flower begins to die. With every wilting minute, the old flower feels a weight that is so heavy, the old feeling of sadness creeps in and it begins to cry. The tears shed right over the new flower and with it renews the life so close to death. This becomes a cycle of sadness for the two flowers. Without sadness, the flowers cannot be happy.

Out of sadness springs life.

COPYRIGHT: CARLA HAGLUND

Do you remember everything I say to you?

Late night heart beat drumming 
Sober palpitations 
I won't eat and I won't sleep
Because I'm not myself at present
Forgive my state of lunacy 
Grinning in the dark
Fever in the dead of night
Time stands still
The more I get out of my head 
The more I go away

Do you remember everything I say to you?

This is a lament
A lament for nonsense
For all the useless
Silence
I find hiding in the worries
Somewhere
Escaping my sight
Dancing out of my glare
Living in the night
Screaming in the light
Too close out of sight

Do you remember everything I say to you?


Ive left my mind with you
But you won't read it
Leaving you in my center of gravity
my lungs were stolen
While coughing out my insanity
You became extinct
I see you in someone else
That someone else is not me
I'm growing old with
playing with my oblivion
There's nothing but right now
Running myself out of 
A never ending reel

Do you remember everything I say to you?

This is a lament
A lament for nonsense
For all the useless
Silence
I find hiding in the worries
Somewhere
Escaping my sight
Dancing out of my glare
Living in the night
Screaming in the light
Too close out of sight

Do you remember everything I say to you?
Tongue to tongue 
Twisting fighting lying loving

All for you.

Copyright: Carla Haglund

 

I looked into the sun
When I closed my eyes
I couldn't see
I couldn't see
The sun blinded me
I looked into your eyes
When I opened my heart
I couldn't feel
I couldn't feel
Your darkness closed me in
When I opened the door
There was nothing
Not even air
I couldn't breathe
I couldn't breathe
The taste of you left my mouth
It was empty
When I fell to the ground
I didn't make a sound
I was a feather weightless
Nobody could hear me
I am unheard
I am unseen
I still bleed
I still bleed
The cut runs deep
But my veins are tapped out
My blood dries
My tears never do

I like to feel the water
Just before midnight
Sit inside a pool of my thoughts
Gather all the windows
To watch the people fall
Take the steps to nowhere
To see how far they go
Get there and don't return
Stay in nowhere land

Copyright: Carla Haglund